Monday, April 9, 2018

Emotions in my Ocean

Emotions. Being someone who is studying to become a counselor you would think I would be comfortable with them.
Except I am not. At least not my own emotions. They scare me. 

And lately they have been coming fast and furious. Life with chronic illness is like swimming through a ocean. Sometimes things are good and you swim past some beautiful coral. Other moments you spot a shark and it attacks you right on your path. Recently, I have been seeing lots of sharks. Diabetes has been behaving itself quite well, but other things have been popping up all over my ocean like an evil algae that just won’t stop. Other medical struggles and the stress of dealing with so much adulting have got me feeling sad. 

I don’t like dwelling on things I cannot change but in my heart I know my frustrations are valid. I know it’s ok to wish my body could cooperate more. To dream of not having Diabetes and everything that comes with it weighing down my anchor. But we cannot change the ocean we have been given. I must embrace the beauty around me and become friends with my sharks. Because they are not leaving. No matter how angry, sad, or frustrated I get with them. They are here to teach me lessons. To give strength, to foster joy, to teach perseverance.  Just keep swimming, forever and always...